“He sounds like a tranny monster.”
– Our neighbour makes strange noises when he plays with his kids and they always end up crying. Always.
“I’m so tired of the wind being abusive. I think it needs to get therapy.”
– Maybe he’s just misunderstood.
“This tastes like a fish aquarium that hasn’t been cleaned. In five years.”
– Some craft beers are better than others.
“Let’s sell everything and go live in the nothing.”
– When you get over 250 spam emails a day, disconnecting is the dream.
“It smells like vegetable human soup in here.”
– And it tastes like chicken.
“I’m gonna go put some skin on my face.”
– And you thought morning breath was a problem.
“I’ll show you under the curtain a little bit.”
– Happy Valentines Day to me!
“Sometimes your funny goes wrong.”
– Sorta like her sentences.
“I’m not even sure you can cheese.”
– Oh I can. I just choose not to.
“It’s a fan flavourite.”
– Her word soup is very popular.
“I’ve been trying to keep my eyes open for months.”
– Zombie alert.