– Some people question their decisions. I question their choice of words.
Author:
“It has chart terries in it.”
– Fruit? Or breed of dog? Either way it was tasty.
“I didn’t bring any make for you.”
– In other words, there’s only one coffee, and it’s hers.
“We need to win the library.”
– We can afford all the books we want, as long as we have a lottery card.
“I’m gonna heat up some stir frice.”
– When you’re hungry sometimes you eat a few letters.
“Is there another Kuti?”
– Yes. Fela, Femi, and the kind you get from boys.
“We’re not in the same team zone.”
– She likes to eat dinner, eat ice cream, and go to bed – quickly. I like to eat dinner, eat ice cream, and go to bed – slowly.
“I’ve got no more waitience.”
– When she gets tired of waiting for me and starts to lose patience.
“I don’t know what’s gonna happen. I wish I could look into the future ball.”
– I’m no fortune teller, but it’s crystal clear to me: More sleep.
“You get to write all the quirps.”
– That’s what I do on this site. Quotes. Quips. Quirps.
“I don’t have thousand dollar pairs of shoes. I’d rather save an elephant.”
– On the subject of the proper level of investment one should make in sunglasses.